Giant Apes!

Giant apes attacking is one of the biggest threats facing mankind today (the biggest is robots). They threaten our cities, steal attractive women, and seriously damage our antique WWI-era fighter planes.
New York has even invited one to stay in its fair (okay, not really) city, in Times Square, as pictured above. Yes, New York, we all know it looks cute now, but after the premiere, it'll stop holding your attention, and you're just going to flush it down the toilet, aren't you? Then, in the sewers, it'll grow to full size and terrorize sanitation workers and the alligators that are also down there.
Damn it, New York, this wouldn't be a problem if you could take care of your pets. Couldn't you get something orthodox, like a giant dog, or possibly an oversized rabbit?
(Although I do admit that a giant ape is a good insurance policy against Godzilla, who threatens our shores daily.)
Ain't it Cool News.