Meanwhile, in the Grammar Crisis room....

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Oh God, it's another video game post!

A few days ago, Gamepro called the next-gen console race in favor of the Playstation 3. Nowadays, though, seeking Gamepro's advice about videogames is a bit like asking Kevin Federline about the electoral college - you're not likely to receive a comprehensible answer.
Why bring it up, you ask? Because it serves as a flimsy pretext to rant about the new consoles. Tonight, I'll be answering that most ineffable of questions: why are PS3 fans so damn annoying?
You may have seen these folks on the internet, typing out grammatical-error-laced tomes about how the Blu-Ray drive is the greatest thing since sliced bread, how Sony invented videogames and how $600 is not a lot of money. You may ask yourself: how can these people be so damn irritating?
I'll tell you why. It's because Playstation advocates are Yankee fans.
Not literally, of course, but metaphorically.
Think about it: a fanbase that obnoxiously starts listing recent successes whenever criticized (Playstation fans list their two successive dominant systems as proof of infallibility; Yankees fans list their World Series wins). The fans are both advocating very expensive products (Playstation 3: $600; Is there still a number as high as the Yankee payroll?). Both believe past successes have made them utterly incapable of losing. And both are led by a executive who might be insane (PS3: Riiiiiidge Raaacer!; Yankees: Steinbrenner).
Xbox fans seem like Red Sox fans: we bitch about the Yankees payroll, but we fail to notice how ours is second-highest. Indeed, this team (console) has a very "second place" feel to it. The team is good, and the console has good games, but it needs a lot of luck (and something cancelling out the PS3) to win it all.
Tomorrow: the thrilling conclusion, and why those who fail to choose a side are pantywaists.


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